Literally choked while eating my mushroom meatball & laterally when I saw that picture...
I'm not the type to tell what's wrong..cause I have faith that people have awareness regarding their action. One of the good quality that I learned from someone precious before...
Usually,I'm not this sensitive..but tonight I cant't help but cry. I'm not jealous,I'm not angry...but..I'm feeling insecure,I feel vulnerable,I feel exposed & above all, I'm afraid of losing. I cant go through it anymore,I just can't. I blame myself for this,for having this feeling...I pity myself.
Pengalaman mendewasakan..maybe. But pengalaman juga membuatkan diri ini fobia.
I'm just afraid... I know I cant go through the same thing again. I just dont have the strength,not anymore.
Sunday, March 24, 2013
Choked...
Thursday, March 21, 2013
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
Ohhh Pakar Bahasa Inggeris
Andainya begitu mudah utk translate English ke BM. Mencabar tugas kali ini...terutama bila label di atas meja stated as 'Pakar Bahasa Inggeris' -.-"
Apapun,seronok eventhough byk kerja & pening kepala. Yg best, cukup mkn (makin bumbum la lps tok hoho)
Okeyh..juh ngerayo tepi waterfront lok dgn member semadi nunggu dinner jam 7 klk..
Assalamualaikum ^_^
Sunday, March 10, 2013
The return of me ^^,
Assalamualaikum...
Skali lg muncul d alam maya stlh lama menyepi. Hikhik..dh mcm chipsmore kan? Haaa...tok dh pake semartpon boleh la ngupdate dgn gigih tok.(kdk la ada yg baca)~~
Kblkgn ni bz la pulak. Dgn audit yg bkl kunjung tiba, next week gik kursus seminggu (dpt merasa tdo ekon & tilam best :p ), homework utk event 'ya' gik (if jadi laa)...
Apapun klk ada ms update gik..ngantok bena dh tok lps mkn McD td..
Saturday, August 25, 2012
Choices in life....
Assalamualaikum...
As usual, if I cant sleep here is where I will start to weave my thoughts & gibberish (maybe) ideas.. ^_^
Its been too long since I done a post on a literature piece, so I'll start this post here with one of my favourite poem (was reminded by Miss A tonight bout literature)...We learn it in our secondary school (in Kuching)
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
Personally to me this poem is very meaningful. It thought me about the choices we have and are given in life. I mean, yes we are destined or as some prefer to say, we DO have our FATE...But I just can't bury it in my logic sense that Allah don't give us any choices in life. Allah maha Adil, Maha Penyayang, Maha Mengasihani...Allah is Great. I believe He has his own way to teach us in each choices that he present to us.
Robert Frost is a brilliant author who can come up with this simple yet moving piece of art. Lets move on stanza by stanza based on my interpretation...
1st stanza
Along our life journey, we are always presented with choices... Tipu sgt la if kata yang kita tidak pernah diberi peluang untuk bt pilihan dalam hidup. Tiap hari kita diberi pilihan... Pilihan bermaksud we cant have both. We have to choose. And the choice that we chose, usually kita buat after a millionth times of consideration...Betul tak? Itu la yang di nyatakan oleh RF dlm poem ni...Each choices we are presented with, kita akan bt penilaian bg setiap pilihan tersebut. Apakah kesannya kita ambil pilihan tersebut...
2nd stanza
Here, to me, RF ingin menyampaikan idea bahawa tidak salah jika kita ingin menjadi berani...& choose the road that are less taken.. It is not a sin nor it is not a bad thing, if we chose to be different. Different tidak bermaksud kita akan gagal, cuma laluan kita akan berbeza dengan insan lain.
3rd stanza
Disini merujuk kepasa risiko yang kita ambil dalam stanza 2 td..
Andai pilihan yang dibuat itu ternyata byk likunya berbanding laluan yang dah dipilih oleh org sekeliling, janganlah mudah mengalah. In each choice that we have made along our life, I do & ALWAYS believe, there is a silver lining at the end. Mungkin kita akan hadapi pelbagai rintangan, tp jangan jadikan itu sebagai halangan. Ingat ni " Failures are made to make you stand stronger. Mistakes are there to teach you to be a better person, not to quit & give up half way." Kita tak tahu bila kita akan sampai ke hujung perjalanan or bila kita dah berada di pertengahan jalan dalam hidup. So, why not we just carry on...Alang2 menyeluk pekasam, biarlah sampai ke pangkal lengan!
4th stanza
AWAS! ayat 'sigh' tidak lah selalu bermaksud mengeluh...kdg2 juga digunakan utk menyatakan bahawa kita dh mencuba yang terbaik..
Di stanza terakhir ini, kita berada di masa hdpn...Looking at the choices we have made in life, can make us smile, can make us sad... Apapun, itu adalah pilihan yang telah kita bt. Untuk menyesali, jangan. Sbb sekali kita menyesal, bermaksud kita salahkan diri sendiri. Jika kegagalan yg kita temui, jadikan pedoman. :)
All right...baik students.. that's all for tonight hehee..
Pilihan yang saya buat, selalunya adalah utk kebaikan semua, pada masa dan ketika itu. If that makes me a bad person, I don't really give a damn... For me to regret those decisions that I have made...NEVER! But to turn back the time, THAT I wish I can do.
Untuk bt pilihan yang tepat, adalah mustahil (in my opinion). Each choice we made have its own pro & cons.. Cuma kita boleh doakan, disebalik setiap pilihan yang kita buat, semua org yang terlibat akan bahagia & gembira.
It's sometimes a better choice to be hurt than to hurt others. Itu falsafah sy. Tak suka? Sila tinggalkan blog ini..hehehe (gurau je la yer..~~)
Penat dah merapu... Till next time... Adios~~~
As usual, if I cant sleep here is where I will start to weave my thoughts & gibberish (maybe) ideas.. ^_^
Its been too long since I done a post on a literature piece, so I'll start this post here with one of my favourite poem (was reminded by Miss A tonight bout literature)...We learn it in our secondary school (in Kuching)
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
Personally to me this poem is very meaningful. It thought me about the choices we have and are given in life. I mean, yes we are destined or as some prefer to say, we DO have our FATE...But I just can't bury it in my logic sense that Allah don't give us any choices in life. Allah maha Adil, Maha Penyayang, Maha Mengasihani...Allah is Great. I believe He has his own way to teach us in each choices that he present to us.
Robert Frost is a brilliant author who can come up with this simple yet moving piece of art. Lets move on stanza by stanza based on my interpretation...
1st stanza
Along our life journey, we are always presented with choices... Tipu sgt la if kata yang kita tidak pernah diberi peluang untuk bt pilihan dalam hidup. Tiap hari kita diberi pilihan... Pilihan bermaksud we cant have both. We have to choose. And the choice that we chose, usually kita buat after a millionth times of consideration...Betul tak? Itu la yang di nyatakan oleh RF dlm poem ni...Each choices we are presented with, kita akan bt penilaian bg setiap pilihan tersebut. Apakah kesannya kita ambil pilihan tersebut...
2nd stanza
Here, to me, RF ingin menyampaikan idea bahawa tidak salah jika kita ingin menjadi berani...& choose the road that are less taken.. It is not a sin nor it is not a bad thing, if we chose to be different. Different tidak bermaksud kita akan gagal, cuma laluan kita akan berbeza dengan insan lain.
3rd stanza
Disini merujuk kepasa risiko yang kita ambil dalam stanza 2 td..
Andai pilihan yang dibuat itu ternyata byk likunya berbanding laluan yang dah dipilih oleh org sekeliling, janganlah mudah mengalah. In each choice that we have made along our life, I do & ALWAYS believe, there is a silver lining at the end. Mungkin kita akan hadapi pelbagai rintangan, tp jangan jadikan itu sebagai halangan. Ingat ni " Failures are made to make you stand stronger. Mistakes are there to teach you to be a better person, not to quit & give up half way." Kita tak tahu bila kita akan sampai ke hujung perjalanan or bila kita dah berada di pertengahan jalan dalam hidup. So, why not we just carry on...Alang2 menyeluk pekasam, biarlah sampai ke pangkal lengan!
4th stanza
AWAS! ayat 'sigh' tidak lah selalu bermaksud mengeluh...kdg2 juga digunakan utk menyatakan bahawa kita dh mencuba yang terbaik..
Di stanza terakhir ini, kita berada di masa hdpn...Looking at the choices we have made in life, can make us smile, can make us sad... Apapun, itu adalah pilihan yang telah kita bt. Untuk menyesali, jangan. Sbb sekali kita menyesal, bermaksud kita salahkan diri sendiri. Jika kegagalan yg kita temui, jadikan pedoman. :)
All right...baik students.. that's all for tonight hehee..
Pilihan yang saya buat, selalunya adalah utk kebaikan semua, pada masa dan ketika itu. If that makes me a bad person, I don't really give a damn... For me to regret those decisions that I have made...NEVER! But to turn back the time, THAT I wish I can do.
Untuk bt pilihan yang tepat, adalah mustahil (in my opinion). Each choice we made have its own pro & cons.. Cuma kita boleh doakan, disebalik setiap pilihan yang kita buat, semua org yang terlibat akan bahagia & gembira.
It's sometimes a better choice to be hurt than to hurt others. Itu falsafah sy. Tak suka? Sila tinggalkan blog ini..hehehe (gurau je la yer..~~)
Penat dah merapu... Till next time... Adios~~~
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
Just for the fun of it ^_^
Assalamualaikum...
It's the 4th day of Eidul Fitr... My 1st day of Eid was with my Mr. 2nd was with fams & we had sooo much fun! Don't bother asking bout the 3rd--I got stung by something (until now IDK what stung me -.-" )
Eid, which is a celebration after the fasting month of Ramadhan, is often associated with delicious food galore, colourful attire & open houses.. It's a special occasion where all the family members gather from near & far to strengthen their ties. Well we all know, FAMILY is IMPORTANT right..
Nahh my post actually is not on Eid...It's on relationship....
Somehow, sometimes, always, for me..a relationship is a two way street kinda thing. It's always meant to be in plural form, not singular. Acceptance, honesty & sincerity are the key structure of what I define as a relationship.
Acceptance --> not only the partner, also the whole army of theirs...It's vital for me.
Honesty --> if not in a comfortable situation, tell & we'll get out of it. If don't want @ reluctant, it's best to just say 'No'...It's better than to beat around the bush, which is kinda frustrating every time ~~
Sincerity --> with your thoughts & feelings.
Man...we're all humans. We, or rather, I, cant read other people's mind. But always action speaks fluently & it's judge-able (eventho, it might not be correct), So, Allah help me!! Ahahaha...
Maybe it's time to think back & just try to justify & be honest with ourselves.
To what extent do I want to be involve in the army troops of my partner?
Do I even want to be with them?
How do I feel about them?
How will I manage with them?
Answer that honestly..
Then ask yourself...
How close do I want my partner to be with my family?
How do I want my partner to react with my family?
How much do I want my partner to accept my whole troops of army?
Compare those answers...See the difference between the answers. If it's neutral @ almost the same, then Alhamdulillah... If the difference are significant, I do think, it's time for you to actually think back & get a grip of what or where the relation should be heading to~~~
Renung-renungkan & Selamat beramal hehehe~~~ :) No pun intended...
Saturday, August 11, 2012
Salam~~~
Nah...tinggal seminggu lagi utk ke penghujung Ramadhan & tibalah Syawal. Yg paling penting, puasa penuh setakat ini...hopefully tak slack la ujung2 bln kelak. Mls na mok ganti huhuuhhu~~
As always, time mcm tok la ati I sik best. Nangga org sekeliling bz jak becarik brg k beraya dgn family. Shopping complex tang padat jak dgn bala2 shoppers (lommm..mgu tok dh bonus, dpn gomen gaji, kuasa 4 kali kadar kepadatan penduduk lam shopping complex ya klk..hoho) 0.o"
Terasa aih, bila terpaksa beraya sorg2. Awal pagi org bz jak dgn family dikpun,kecoh serumah bisin but me? Usually pagi raya, (berdasarkan pengalaman yg sik seberapa) lps bgun solat subuh ya, alu la peng gik atas katil sampe ke tghari. Mun jak rajin mok bkemas, gurin2 jak atas tilam, kt sofa ruang tamu nangga tb. Mun g bjarah pun, I tok ne ada kwn gilak. Nang dasar tutup pintu sllunya. Bak kata daddy--> Sik mesra alam~~hikhikhik
Terasa mok memanjakan dirik jak raya tok. lak la nangga rate gne. Mun sik d luar jangkauan minda yg sik brp nok normal I tok, InsyaAllah, akan I g manjakan diri sebaik mungkin~~Yay! Hrp2 dapat~~
Apapun, bersyukur sbb d beri dugaan kdk tok. Padan muka ada juak la hikhik (bkn nyesal k, sik pnh nyesal) Alah, ada gik Gawai & Xmas ngan family bah.
Mun sik berpeluang ada family dikpun, I mok polah stail cina. Asal ada PH pnjg jak, g holiday mkn angin. Nah, ada juak best nangga tmpt org gne beraya....
Oh angan2 ya~~~ngantok dh mata melayan tok.Dah ari ujan, kompom nyemmss jak tdo tok. Tdo juh~~Night night...
Nah...tinggal seminggu lagi utk ke penghujung Ramadhan & tibalah Syawal. Yg paling penting, puasa penuh setakat ini...hopefully tak slack la ujung2 bln kelak. Mls na mok ganti huhuuhhu~~
As always, time mcm tok la ati I sik best. Nangga org sekeliling bz jak becarik brg k beraya dgn family. Shopping complex tang padat jak dgn bala2 shoppers (lommm..mgu tok dh bonus, dpn gomen gaji, kuasa 4 kali kadar kepadatan penduduk lam shopping complex ya klk..hoho) 0.o"
Terasa aih, bila terpaksa beraya sorg2. Awal pagi org bz jak dgn family dikpun,kecoh serumah bisin but me? Usually pagi raya, (berdasarkan pengalaman yg sik seberapa) lps bgun solat subuh ya, alu la peng gik atas katil sampe ke tghari. Mun jak rajin mok bkemas, gurin2 jak atas tilam, kt sofa ruang tamu nangga tb. Mun g bjarah pun, I tok ne ada kwn gilak. Nang dasar tutup pintu sllunya. Bak kata daddy--> Sik mesra alam~~hikhikhik
Terasa mok memanjakan dirik jak raya tok. lak la nangga rate gne. Mun sik d luar jangkauan minda yg sik brp nok normal I tok, InsyaAllah, akan I g manjakan diri sebaik mungkin~~Yay! Hrp2 dapat~~
Apapun, bersyukur sbb d beri dugaan kdk tok. Padan muka ada juak la hikhik (bkn nyesal k, sik pnh nyesal) Alah, ada gik Gawai & Xmas ngan family bah.
Mun sik berpeluang ada family dikpun, I mok polah stail cina. Asal ada PH pnjg jak, g holiday mkn angin. Nah, ada juak best nangga tmpt org gne beraya....
Oh angan2 ya~~~ngantok dh mata melayan tok.Dah ari ujan, kompom nyemmss jak tdo tok. Tdo juh~~Night night...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)